Thursday, March 31, 2016

swimming sports day at Silverdale normal Descriptive writing

Walt: describe the senior swimming sports day

Remember the:

Roar of Mr Taylors voice, to quieten us for the subsequent event
Giggles of excitement leading up to an event
Chitter chatter of the children on the banks of the pool,
“Go!” boomed by Mr taylor's voice that echoed in my ears
Screams of the crowd as loud as a banchee, cheering on the swimmers
Crystal clear water brushing our physiques as we glided to the finish
Hands slapping the aquatic as they plunged below the deep blue
Splashes of clear aqua cascading down the sides of the pool
Cool drips sliding down our bodies as we departed the pool
Puddles laying quietly on the ground awaiting the pitter patter of feet
Dusky blue sky peering down upon us and the Soft nibbles of the sun, warming our skin.  The Cool breeze that brushed over our bodies, drying us like a towel.
Quiet lays upon us as the children depart to their homes.
Stillness, calm, emptiness!

Success Criteria (My writing to be successful should include these language features

Adjectives, crystal clear water
Alliteration (repeating sounds/letters)  chitter chatter, pitter patter
Similes  (compare using like or as)  loud as a banchee
Metaphors  (compare without using like or as)  crystal water
Personification  (adding a human characteristic to a non-human object)  breeze brushed over our bodies

Short sentences for impact 

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